[ He takes a moment to give her a weary glance, as if to say, "Seriously, Maya?"--
But then he can feel the next step he moves to give way slightly, and it's only due to his quick reflexes that he narrowly avoids the electrified dart that flies from the right wall and embeds itself into the left. ]
... I kinda do now, yeah. Uh, so avoid that step right there.
Maya! [ It comes out in a gasp, and Peter looks utterly scandalized, his free hand splayed against his chest. ] We are working right now! We can discuss the whip situation when we're done.
[ She has something sarcastic on the tip of her tongue, but a blinking red light on the ceiling catches her eye, and she shoves him into the wall, hand coming up to catch the security camera in a phaselock before it can fully rotate and spot them. It's close thing, and she has to press against him to stay out of the camera's line of sight ]
[ He doesn't realize what's happening at first, and he's so close to saying, "Maya, you are incorrigible," before he spots the red light himself. He nods once, then starts moving again. ]
Bear with me, because this is a long and sordid tale.
Okay so I have this friend back on Pandora, his name is Brick, and he had this dog that he was really attached to. Anyway, Handsome Jack's girlfriend sort of... killed it. So to get his revenge he asked me and the other Vault Hunters to rob the bank in the town where she was the sheriff.
It was far from subtle- we had to build this bomb, right? But the metal that the vault door was made out of could only be dissolved by skag bile. So we had to build a bomb and then get a skag to eat it.
[ He nearly lets out a loud laugh, but he holds it back at the last second, covering his mouth. How stupid would it be to get them caught by guffawing when they've already avoided guards and booby traps and cameras? ]
Oh my God, that's the grodiest thing I've ever heard. [ Not that it's stopped him from being utterly entertained by it.
They finally reach the bottom of the stairs, which leads them to another hallway. This time the lighting is poor and nonexistent at certain stretches, and Peter mourns the fact that he didn't tuck away a plasma ball to light the way. ]
[ Maya sides off the glove that she's been wearing over her tattooed hand, a ball of purple energy amassing in her palm. The light it gives off isn't too bright, but it's better than nothing. ] I can only do this in short stretches, but it should get us through.
Oh, you're a package deal. Beautiful, smart, funny, and a flashlight in a pinch.
[ He's careful as he picks his way through, mindful of each tile he steps on. He holds Maya's hand throughout, helping her step over tiles that he finds suspicious.
[ The come through to the other side of the hallway, unskewered and unseen, and they're greeted by a giant, gunmetal grey door. If Peter remembers right, this should lead to one last room right before the vault proper. ]
... Is it weird that I feel like we should've been shot at by now? I'm kinda missing it. That's weird, right?
[ He laughs at her description -- oh my god how can a badass be so friggin' cute? -- and nods. ] Admiral Ackbar -- and I hope not, but you know our luck.
[ Eventually he thinks, Eh, fuck it, what's the worst that can happen? and opens the door. So it's only natural that after tempting fate, opening the door reveals two violet-skinned men the size of Drax, who exchange puzzled glances before looking at Peter.
Wide-eyed, Peter stares at them. His eyes flick briefly to the two huge swords they each have strapped to their backs.
She doubts they can talk their way out of this one- they sort of had to open a secret door to get down here, and avoid all the traps and everything.
Sooo she pops one of them up in a phaselock right away, flames engulfing him instantly. She keeps Peter close- for some reason her wings don't seem to hurt anyone she doesn't want them to hurt. That should at least stop the other guy from getting too close for a little bit. ]
[ Thank God for Maya's fast reflexes. She catches the two men by surprise, and the one not currently on fire hesitates to move toward them, but boy, does he look pissed.
The second Maya gets the guy in a phaselock, Peter's hands fly to his sides for his blasters-- which aren't there. Damn.
His right hand then goes to touch the switch behind his ear-- which also isn't there. Fuck.
He backs up from the door, thinking that they can at least funnel them through while he thinks of a better plan than "try to punch the big scary guy." ]
I'm starting to wish one of us tried smuggling in a knife, after all.
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But then he can feel the next step he moves to give way slightly, and it's only due to his quick reflexes that he narrowly avoids the electrified dart that flies from the right wall and embeds itself into the left. ]
... I kinda do now, yeah. Uh, so avoid that step right there.
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[ her smirk is downright triumphant ]
Give me a hand- I'm gonna faceplant in these heels if I try and step over it myself.
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At your service, my lady.
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[ She takes his hand, using him as balance to get over the step ]
I sure hope we don't get chased out of here by a giant boulder. [ movie reference! ]
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Funny you should mention that. I've been thinking about wearing a hat like Indy's. Thoughts?
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I can't hold it forever. We need to move.
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Sorry. I'll be good.
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[ once they're around the backside of the camera, she lets her phaselock drop. It's quiet for a bit before Maya pipes up, ]
... Did I ever tell you that I robbed a bank once?
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Okay so I have this friend back on Pandora, his name is Brick, and he had this dog that he was really attached to. Anyway, Handsome Jack's girlfriend sort of... killed it. So to get his revenge he asked me and the other Vault Hunters to rob the bank in the town where she was the sheriff.
It was far from subtle- we had to build this bomb, right? But the metal that the vault door was made out of could only be dissolved by skag bile. So we had to build a bomb and then get a skag to eat it.
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That's frikkin' amazing. How'd you manage that?
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The tricky part was getting him to cough it back up.
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We soaked the thing in laxative, and he barfed it back up.
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They finally reach the bottom of the stairs, which leads them to another hallway. This time the lighting is poor and nonexistent at certain stretches, and Peter mourns the fact that he didn't tuck away a plasma ball to light the way. ]
Well then. This will be fun.
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[ He's careful as he picks his way through, mindful of each tile he steps on. He holds Maya's hand throughout, helping her step over tiles that he finds suspicious.
So far so good. ]
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[ she gives his hand a squeeze, amused. She has to stop every once and a while to give her powers a rest, but they seem to be making good progress. ]
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... Is it weird that I feel like we should've been shot at by now? I'm kinda missing it. That's weird, right?
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[ Eventually he thinks, Eh, fuck it, what's the worst that can happen? and opens the door. So it's only natural that after tempting fate, opening the door reveals two violet-skinned men the size of Drax, who exchange puzzled glances before looking at Peter.
Wide-eyed, Peter stares at them. His eyes flick briefly to the two huge swords they each have strapped to their backs.
He swallows. ]
Um. Hi?
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Oh shit.
She doubts they can talk their way out of this one- they sort of had to open a secret door to get down here, and avoid all the traps and everything.
Sooo she pops one of them up in a phaselock right away, flames engulfing him instantly. She keeps Peter close- for some reason her wings don't seem to hurt anyone she doesn't want them to hurt. That should at least stop the other guy from getting too close for a little bit. ]
What was that you were saying about our luck?
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The second Maya gets the guy in a phaselock, Peter's hands fly to his sides for his blasters-- which aren't there. Damn.
His right hand then goes to touch the switch behind his ear-- which also isn't there. Fuck.
He backs up from the door, thinking that they can at least funnel them through while he thinks of a better plan than "try to punch the big scary guy." ]
I'm starting to wish one of us tried smuggling in a knife, after all.
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